Death In Venice – Rob Barratt
January 31st, 2009 | Published in Volume III: Cautionary Tales
Venetian waterbus – vaporetto
No gondolier, no “One Cornetto”
You rock and sway, you bump and grind
While I just sit on my behind
No love and peace, no peace and love
Your passengers, they push and shove
They push and shove, they never queue
Not like back home, I’m telling you
Italian, French, the continentals
When you arrive, they all go mental
It’s not a race, it’s no Grand Prix
Just one false move and I’m in the sea
Those disembarking get off-board
To face a Gucci-wearing horde
Rich ladies dressed in furs and slap
Don’t care if I fall through the gap
They hold their little dogs like babies
(I hope they all go down with rabies)
Young lovers clad in shades and Prada
Make getting on just so much harder
No etiquette, no bloody manners
No one complains to the transport planners
There’s no solution, cure or answer
Their arrogance is like a cancer
No subtlety, no being discreet
I’ll just be trampled underfeet
The mob exudes an air of malice
As they make their way to the Doge’s Palace
So please beware, yes please take heed
Of the vaporetto’s mass stampede
If I fall foul of this thronging menace
I’ll just be one more ….. death in Venice